On Being a Stay at Home Wife...
Today I told my boss that working fulltime was cramping my style. He laughed it off but I meant it. I do feel constrained and restricted. I like my job, I like my co-workers and thankfully I also enjoy the flexibility of working from home some of the time but yet, I feel shoved into a box 40 hours a week, albeit an interesting box. Many people can't say that. Maybe I am just spoiled by working only part-time for the past several years. It's not that I sat around, watched Oprah and ate bon-bons for all these years. I was active and productive. But all this time I thought I was preparing to be a stay-at-home mom. This has proved elusive.
So now I ask myself, what's wrong with being a stay-at-home wife? To my surprise , when I told Dave I would rather be working part-time and spending more time at home he smiled and agreed that would be great. I say I was surprised because I know that he likes having the increased income. I enjoy being a wife and I enjoy being home. I like making breakfast and having devotions with Dave. I enoy my morning cup of coffee while I catch up on email. I like being there to make Dave lunch at noon and not having to worry if there is lunch meat i the fridge for him to slap between two pieces of bread.
I grew up with a mother who had me just as the women's liberation movement was gaining momentum. More than any lulaby I remember my mom singing the battlecry of liberated women everywhere, "I am woman hear me roar, in numbers to big to ingore." Through this song and her actions she taught me that I did not need a man to be complete and fulfilled. She taught me how to be independent and strong. All positive things that came out of that era. In turn, my Dad gave me a strong work ethic and the feeling that I was invincible and I could conquer the world, do anything I wanted. Despite the many positive that came from the women's liberation movement I think it caused a lot of young women to believe that they needed a career to be significant and that loving a husband and children was somehow less importatn. Even growing up in an evagelical church taught me that it was my mission to make a difference in the world (not my home), which I set out to do and feel I accomplished in some small way.
Now that I desire just to be at home with or without children baffles me a little. I want more than anything to be a Proverbs 31 woman. I want my husband to be blessed. I want to add value to others by loving, extending grace and mercy, by setting an example. I do feel that what I am doing now is adding value to others and is important but I would like to get back to the basic essence of what a wife of noble character truly is. Not that I think if a woman works outside of the home she can't be a good wife, I am just saying for me, maybe that is the right thing.
So now I ask myself, what's wrong with being a stay-at-home wife? To my surprise , when I told Dave I would rather be working part-time and spending more time at home he smiled and agreed that would be great. I say I was surprised because I know that he likes having the increased income. I enjoy being a wife and I enjoy being home. I like making breakfast and having devotions with Dave. I enoy my morning cup of coffee while I catch up on email. I like being there to make Dave lunch at noon and not having to worry if there is lunch meat i the fridge for him to slap between two pieces of bread.
I grew up with a mother who had me just as the women's liberation movement was gaining momentum. More than any lulaby I remember my mom singing the battlecry of liberated women everywhere, "I am woman hear me roar, in numbers to big to ingore." Through this song and her actions she taught me that I did not need a man to be complete and fulfilled. She taught me how to be independent and strong. All positive things that came out of that era. In turn, my Dad gave me a strong work ethic and the feeling that I was invincible and I could conquer the world, do anything I wanted. Despite the many positive that came from the women's liberation movement I think it caused a lot of young women to believe that they needed a career to be significant and that loving a husband and children was somehow less importatn. Even growing up in an evagelical church taught me that it was my mission to make a difference in the world (not my home), which I set out to do and feel I accomplished in some small way.
Now that I desire just to be at home with or without children baffles me a little. I want more than anything to be a Proverbs 31 woman. I want my husband to be blessed. I want to add value to others by loving, extending grace and mercy, by setting an example. I do feel that what I am doing now is adding value to others and is important but I would like to get back to the basic essence of what a wife of noble character truly is. Not that I think if a woman works outside of the home she can't be a good wife, I am just saying for me, maybe that is the right thing.
Proverbs 31:10-31
A wife of noble character who can find?
A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.
Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value.
She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.
She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands.
She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar.
She gets up while it is still dark;
Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value.
She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.
She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands.
She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar.
She gets up while it is still dark;
she provides food for her family and portions for her servant girls.
She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks.
She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night.
In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy.
When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks.
She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night.
In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy.
When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes.
She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.
She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her:
"Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all."
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.
She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes.
She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.
She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her:
"Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all."
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.
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